Saturday, October 18, 2008

Mt. Everest is 29,141 ft. high

Peace Ya’ll! With the cold approaching, one’s Mind is forced to consider warmth and in considering warmth you ultimately start thinking about ‘Relationships’; either the one you have, the one you don’t have or the one you wish you had. Anyway, as we get ready to enter America’s most celebrated Family Holiday Season (Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years), here are some of my Thoughts on ‘Relationships’:

My Young Earth ‘Asiyah’
During the Summer I noticed a slight change in my Queen’s behavior and our relationship; she proactively showed me alot more affection and was alot more articulate in how “she cee’s” things. That was different for me because she’s usually alot more reserved. Anyway, Queen Asiyah had her first Menstrual (Moon) Cycle on Sept. 15th, 2008, so this explained the changes she was already going through. Asiyah just turned knowledge understanding on 10/10 (Our Nation Born Day!) yet it seems like it was yesterday that I was changing her dirty diapers. -gazing off smiling- We are definitely in a different place in our relationship now and Asiyah has begun to really assert her “own self” (13/1-36). I built with some Women in my Family and a few other Women about this experience and they were all very insightful. One thing that has been brought to Mind is the fact that this moment in Asiyah’s growth and development has gone and went without much celebration or acknowledgement outside of me. This -I’m sure- is a very significant, landmark experience in her journey into Womanhood and I would have loved to have had some kinda Rite to acknowledge this; I definitely will for my youngest Queen Aziza. The problem is that their Mother moved close to Power Hill a few years back and our relationship -me and my Queens- have gone through alot of changes since this time; all for the greater good -as I sometimes remind myself. Anyway, Asiyah began her Moon Cycle on the knowledge power day of September while she was in School; her Mother emailed me about it. When I had a chance to build with Asiyah about it she nonchalantly shrugged it off like it wasn’t nothing. -?- She said she found out when she went to the bathroom so she just used a whole bunch of toilet paper like a pad until she got outta School and told her Mother when she got home. Her Moon Cycle lasted for 5 days and she said she didn’t feel any of the cramps I heard Women talk about. My Sister ‘Aziza’ (whom my youngest Queen is named after) laughed and said how mature Asiyah is for her age! Aziza said when her Moon Cycle started she was all down in the Nurses Office acting a fuckin fool! LMAO! If ever I had to deal with the unknown, this is definitely it; my eyes are wide open and I’m learning as I go. I started by sending Asiyah a couple boxes of Herbal Tea designed to help comfort Women during their Moon Cycle. I am, without a doubt, a Newborn in this and I approach this experience with the same sense of sobriety, humbleness and willingness to learn when I knowledged 120; Asiyah is now my Enlightener! -smile-

Gender Polytricks
When it comes to a Woman, I KNOW WITHOUT A DOUBT that the chauvinistic, misogynistic, gender oppressive infrastructure of America has forced Women to adopt -what Sha calls- a BPC (Beauty Pageant Complex), Obsessive Compulsive Behavior about achieving and competing with their male counterparts, and Anxiety Stress about Motherhood, Marriage and Security; general characteristics that have distorted her concept of Love and Relationships. My Sister Aziza (whom my Young Queen is named after) shrugged her shoulders and humorously told me that Feminism is a response to this Social Construct and is nothing more than “a pussy with sharp teeth” LOL! As Men -Original Men in particular- we’ve been guilty of co-signing this Patriarchal Status Quo, oftentimes with no idea that we’re doing it! I consistently check myself about this and my first real introduction to this way of thinking is when I had my first Queen; Asiyah. Being the best Father I can be to her and Aziza hinges upon my ability to be conscious of their struggles not just as my daughters b.u.t. as females and as Women. Because of this, I’ve grown in ways that many Men have not and I owe a great deal of that to my Queens, and of course the Women who’ve I gotten to know. When we say that the Woman represents ‘Equality’ or 6, I cee it simply as it is; Equal. Equality has two words in it, Equal and Quality which essentially means ‘Same Nature’. Ultimately, Man and Woman are Equal in a sense that we have the same essential nature and unrestricted access to it; Cosmic Consciousness, Universal Intelligence, The Black Mind. What this functionally translates into is that I don’t have some -not all- of the same attitudes, concerns, and hang-ups males -and Men- have about Women and relationships in general. Here’s a few of the Main Attitudes, Concerns and Hang-up’s a cee Men having that compromises our ability to have and maintain successful Relationships:

Attitudes: Possessiveness. Men who objectify Women as “Theirs” are running them into the arms of another Man -and sometimes another Woman-, regardless if they’re Married or not! Although some Women have taken on the attitude of being an object themselves, life itself shows her through experiences that she’s much more than that. When she goes through these situations and comes to you for clarity b.u.t. you’re still in “objectify” mode, she’ll find someone who can relate. Unfortunately for you, she probably won’t be crying on the shoulder of that “gay guy” you discouraged her from befriending. LOL!

Concerns: Role. Men that are so concerned about micro-managing what a Woman needs to be doing overlook what their own role is in the relationship; there’s a double standard here that doesn’t support or encourage Equality. In the process, you make a situation where a Woman will eventually be dissatisfied, unhealthy and unfulfilled; she can’t fuckin breathe Dude!

Hang-ups: I am the Man; EGO. I said it before and I’ll say it again: EGO Edges God Out every time! Males who feel the need to continuously assert themselves as “The Man”, have a deep rooted insecurity that a Woman can’t find security in, even if she wanted to! The results of this is the same as Attitudes and Concerns; in time she’ll find the strength to leave or do some shit to make you leave!

In saying all of this, I’ve learned the importance of recognizing and analyzing the extent to which this Social Construct has effected my views on Relationships, how I view myself and how Women have been taught to view themselves.

Emotional Batches of Ice Cream
For years, I’ve been writing to Brothers locked up and have known Women who hold these Brothers down. The other day I was thinking about a section in the Mathemanual ‘Da God’ when Be God Allah was building about relationships while being in the Injustice (AKA: Prison House); Men locked up pouring their hearts out to Women who in turn use them as an idealistic security blanket. I call this exchange ‘Emotional batches of Ice Cream’. I got a Blood Brother locked up in Attica as we speak, numerous Brothers/God Brothers around the Country -who write me every week- and know Women who have relationships with Men that are locked up, so I peep game. I’ve often asked myself, what’s the difference between moral support and mutual manipulation? I’ve ceen moral support and I’ve ceen mutual manipulation. The relationships that function as ‘Emotional batches of Ice Cream’ are veiled as moral support b.u.t. actually function as mutual manipulation. Based upon mutual “Insecurities”, these ‘Emotional batches of Ice Cream’ consists of these empty calorie ingredients; a Man who secures a relationship with a Woman from a Secured Facility and a Woman seeking security in a Man who’s in a secured location 24/7, 365 days a year. Aside from the Ego strokes and Autoeroticism this relationship encourages and maintains for them, it’s the ultimate Religious experience; I’ve found that people who experience these relationships consciously/unconsciously build shrines to eachother using objects -they exchange- in order to consummate this symbolic Marriage in the Mind. All of these things are not bad within themselves. The dilemma exists when this kind of love, commitment, loyalty and respect for eachother is “built in a prison house” (29/1-40). Cee, “Yacub didn’t build prison houses for his people” (29/1-40) because he understood that it would undermine his ability to be successful in all his undertakings. Now if Yacub knew “a prison house” would fuck up his ability to make a Devil, you know it had to be fucked up! LMAO! Anyway, a prison house limits freedom of expression and immobilizes a person; Mentally, Emotionally and Physically. This immobility is present in the Man locked up and the Woman on the outside; both of them are limited in their ability to functionally express who and what they actually are. Therein lies the false sense of comfort in such a relationship; they can and will be what the other person wants them to be IN EACHOTHERS MIND. The problem with this is not just the fact that it’s idealistically unreal, b.u.t. it allows people to get away with being only a half a person, and being a part time person is alot easier for many people; especially those with emotional issues. Yacub had sense enough to not build prison houses because he wanted to cee the full dimensions of the people he was dealing with (Yacubs first rule was TO SEE...28/1-40). ‘Cub knew that the manufacturing process hinged upon making an accurate assessment of the personal and people product he was going to use. Why? To be “successful in his under-takings” (29/1-40). Again, those of us -Men & Woman- who are cultivating these types of “prison house” relationships must honestly analyze our own psychology and ask ourselves the question, “Is our relationship moral support or mutual manipulation?” By taking inventory of our habits/actions, we can determine if this relationship is in fact a “comfort food” (something/someone we ritualistically turn to when we’re mildly/severely depressed). If we do determine that it is an ‘Emotional batch of Ice Cream’, we must then recognize that this is never a healthy thing psychologically, physically, socially or financially; even if we’re calling it Tofutti. -smile- Ultimately, it’s all about learning something about our own emotional framework and hopefully -and often painfully- coming to terms with why we choose to do what we do! Knowing (1) and Understanding (3) this emotional framework is the essence of self Mastery (M/Supreme Alphabet), the path towards discovering/defining “what is his -or her- ownself” (13/1-36), and the reality of Culture Freedom (4).

L.o.v.e. (Learning Or Validating Emotions)
Anything that falls eventually hits the ground, and this includes Love. When it comes to Love, “Are we actually learning or simply validating bullshit emotions?” I hear people talk about “Unconditional” Love all the time and I’m not sure what that means either. Huh, maybe people make Emerald City statements like that cuz it sounds and looks good. -shrugs- Well back here in Kansas, as soon as a Man or Woman is stuck in the middle of an Ego shattering experience that questions their self importance, those “Unconditional” ideals about Love go right out the fuckin window. LOL! We all have ‘moments of indiscretion’ -as white folks put it- b.u.t if a person is consistently disloyal to their own ideals, what makes you think they’ll ever be loyal to yours! -shakes head- People need to realize that we live in “a Wilderness of North America” (3/1-10). The fact that it is a Wilderness means that shit will get wild as soon as you crack open your front door, and this “Wilderness” comprises the bulk of our experiences and social interactions; unless we’re living confined to a house and get Meals on Wheels. In reality, very little time is spent in the nice little “Jerusalem-like” safe haven we wanna call a relationship -Home- (5/1-14). Because of this reality, I’ve grown to realize that I can only truly Love a Woman who Loves me in a Wilderness. DON’T MISUNDERSTAND ME, I love the Jerusalemian dialogue, coddling, cuddling, intimacy, etc... that are vital components of any relationship “founded in Peace” (5/1-14), b.u.t. just like the geographic place called Jerusalem, I never loose sight of what ultimately surrounds and gives context to this place; civil unrest, social instability, political tension, economic hardships, moral decay, etc..! In this context, to view a relationship as a Jerusalem-like safe haven or fall-out shelter is not the appropriate approach to take -in the midst of a Wilderness; HOW LONG CAN IT LAST? If anything, your Jerusalem -relationship- should be “a Training Unit” (14/1-14) used to proactively assess, define and deal with the unavoidable “trouble amongst the righteous people” (4/1-14) that will compromise this structures integrity! Without this Stratagem, a relationship is nothing b.u.t a sacrificial lamb awaiting it’s slaughter. YES, Jerusalem once served as one of many Central Asian safe havens for the Original Man and Woman b.u.t. only from Earths ‘Natural’ Elements! This was waaaaaaay before the manufacturing of the Devil. For those of you who have studied the “making of the Devil” (30/1-40), the Maccabees, the History of ‘Saladin’ and the Crusades, and the founding of the State of Israel recognize this fact. Jerusalem hasn’t been a safe haven in a very long time; especially in today’s era were people openly desecrate Houses of Worship, destroy Religious/Cultural Iconography and annihilate Men, Women and Children who live righteously on this land! Cee, it’s easy to Love in a Lovely place; I’m not concerned about that! I wanna be Loved when things aren’t Lovely. To me it’s all about the inner dynamics of “Preserving” (1/1-14) and Perpetuating Love, not just obtaining it! If a relationship doesn’t essentially advocate a Religion or Culture “for one common cause” (8/1-14) that will serve as Love’s Value System, Moral Compass, Intellectual/Intuitive ADT Security System, Quality Control Mechanism and Preventative Maintenance Tool, the Love you think you have CANNOT BE SUSTAINED! So through all the disloyalty, flakiness, inconsideration, insincerity and outright bullshit I’ve experienced with Wizs, I still cee light at the end of the tunnel. How? Because it’s the Moon. -smile- One of the most important keys to bringing forth the proper Understanding in a relationship is to approach it as a Journey of constant elevation, not a destination that plateaus on a Mountain called Marriage.


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