Friday, December 23, 2016

Dear Santa Claus

Dear Santa,

   I know you haven't heard from me in a while but I'm writing you on behalf of those of us who still believe in you. Many of us may not say it, but we damn sure do. We believe in you just like we believe these women taking contorted body selfies actually got an hourglass figure. We believe in you like we believe the generic commentary people copy, paste and post on Facebook to look intelligent. We also believe in you like we believe these goldbricking charlatans who claim they're for "the people" yet didn't do a damn thing for the people, in-kind, this year. We may not call you Santa, or even write you letters anymore, but many of us still believe in you.
   The other day in my preschool class when one of my students asked how you made all of those toys another student said, "He don't make them, he gets them from Walmart." Although I don't think you're buying your sh*t from Walmart now, it warmed my little Five Percenter heart to know that my four-year-olds haven't been exposed to that flat earth ghetto scholarship that would have them believing your elves are snow Twa people and direct descendants of Bes.
   Anyway, I know that Christmas has always been about the children but I wanted to ask could you do something for us adults this year? I know you know everything Santa but things look a lot different here in America than on Fox News from the North Pole. Some of my people were really f*cked up behind Billary not getting elected. So if you can.., please stuff their stocking with a little pick me up. Aside from that, here's a small Christmas Wish List I came up with if you decide to do something for us adults this year:
  • Please give some substance, work ethic and the ability to execute to people who are a part of the Conscious Community or who claim to be conscious, have knowledge of self, be WOKE or promote black power. Santa these are some of the most sh*t talkiness sedentary people I've ever seen. If that's too much to ask, please just give these Monday morning quarterbacks some constructive sh*t to do next year. I speak for many people in saying that we are tired of seeing and hearing them critique stuff they have no intention of doing anything about. 
  • Please give some solid reference materials to women throwing around the title Queen. Many of these women primarily define a Queen in terms of extravagance, appearance and Diva-like decorum. Even the names some of them identify with are aesthetic, lacking substance and have nothing to do with a woman's character and virtues. Better yet, there are quite a few sisters I know who exemplify what a true Queen is. If you can just amplify their social media platforms next year so when women are looking for that sense of consciousness, integrity and empowerment, they'll primarily come in contact with them. That would be excellent.
  • I'm not sure how cool you are with Mark Zuckerburg but can you please see if you can get him to automatically flag the bullsh*t memes and gossip in some of the Five Percenter Facebook groups I'm in? I think if people are forced to only post things that practically engage others for the purpose of actually building something tangible, especially for our children, as opposed to theorizing, debating or having pissing contests on Nation History, we could lighten your sleigh Santa.  
  • I would ask for something for these die hard Trump supporters but I'm not sure how you could make their Christmas any whiter. Well, just for sh*ts and giggles leave them and their children a gang of President Obama paraphernalia. 
  • Lastly, could you please give some brothers a list of agencies, organizations and institutions in their city where they can volunteer throughout the year. We need more men involved in helping build strong communities.
   Santa I hope these things weren't too much to ask on such short notice and I understand the enormity of getting it done. I'm only asking you to help us help ourselves. As always, I will continue to do whatever I can to add-on and I want to THANK YOU again for all you do to brighten our children's day in the dark world we adults have made for them. Tell Mrs. Claus I said Peace!

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