Sunday, July 27, 2008

The Other White Meat Tour 2008!!
Poisonous Animal Eaters

Peace Ya'll! I came up with the title of Today's Article when I was sitting back thinking about the popular phrase in the 14/1-40, "poisonous animal eater". For those of you not in the know, a poisonous animal eater is referring to people who eat pork (AKA: swiners). Anyway, this is not just talking about people eating pork chops, chittlin's, bacon, sausage, etc., this also applies to any non-kosher/pareve by-products; shit with pork in it -usually under a name you wouldn't readily identify. I know some Gods and Earths who'll fall out like Damien -The Omen- when he was brought to church for his christening if you brought a slab of pork around em'! It's kinda hilarious b.u.t. personally, it's not my kryptonite. I remember back in high school our basketball team was in a tournament in Glen Falls Now Why and one of my boys -who was an FOI- seriously wanted to fight because I put a pepperoni on his arm. I guess he thought Khan was gonna slap the shit outta him b.u.t anyway I know I was wrong, plus it was during Ramadan! -shakes head- That childish antic was more than 15 years ago and I’m sure if I did it again, he’d probably still wanna fuckin fight! LMAO People really take that biblical “thou shall not touch pork” Math alittle tooooooooooo damn far! I mean, I can’t think of many things that are nastier to touch then money. Well, let me rephrase that because I left some of us out; there are many other things you can touch that’s filthy and one of them is money.

The funniest thing I've ceen are Gods and Earths who aren't poisonous animal eaters yet they eat just like animals who're poisonous. I mean come on, some vegans/raw foodists look exactly like the food they swear they ain't touching! As a matter of fact, it's usually these 'kosher pigs' (phrase of the day! -smile-) who're are the biggest advocates of an all plant lifestyle. -smirk- Let me say this, if your skin looks like mexican pizza, you got a beer gut, or if people can't tell you apart from the average muthafucka that's swinin, then you reaaaalllly need to reconsider your holistic health marketing strategy fam. Unless you actually resemble the benefits of a raw foodist, vegertarian, vegan lifestyle, people aren't really trying to hear the bullshit you advocating! I mean, who in their right mind would buy a weigh gainer formula from a nigga that look anorexic? Keep in Mind that you are what you eat; even if it's a tub of vanilla tofutti!

Now..., when it comes to all this compulsive talk about food, I'm not a fuckin “pre-excrementalist”! Advocating eating certain foods is not that deep to me; I just eat some things and don’t eat other things! -duh- I'm not saying it's not important to 'care' about it, I'm just saying it's not my religion. Anyway, today I'll share with you some of my very own dieting tips:

1. If it makes ya shit stank or your power u hum then don't eat it.
2. If you feel like taking a nap when you're done eating, then don't eat it.
3. If you feel like taking a nap when you're done eating “so-called” good food, then ya greedy ass ate too damn much!
4. If you don't wanna work double and triple shifts every day then don't make your digestive system do it! My stomach/intestines work one shift a day and so do I!
5. Those of you who do take showers, you gotta take showers on the inside too; so drink alot of water.
6. Ya pee should damn near look like water.
7. Take a good shit each and every day, preferably in the morning, or you're gonna deal with more shit than you usually do!
8. If you can't read the ingredients, put that bullshit back.
9. Cows milk is specifically made for an animal with the physical proportions of a big boned, fat ass baby cow.
10. Candy is kid crack.
11. Certain people won't get along in a room and certain foods won't get along in ya stomach. Both the room and your stomach will eventually get fucked up!
12. Bitter is good for the liver.
13. I welcome suggestions from my stomach b.u.t. my stomach don't tell me to do shit!
14. If you're digesting foods properly, the only time you should be on the toilet for more than five minutes is if you're performing a colonic on yourself or you're reading a Jet Magazine.
15. Pouring water on the grill puts the fire out right? Drinking fluids when you eat puts the stomach acids out.

I’ve done everything from eating once every two days, vegetarian, vegan, etc... Now, I simply carry a diet that generally 1.) works best for everyone -regardless of age, gender and ethnicity- , and 2.) specifically works best for me. What I mean by this is that there are certain things I do that are good for everyone, b.u.t. other things that are good specifically for me. Ultimately is all about longevity; if a person is dedicated to elevating their Mind then that should also pertain to the Body. Those who say their about being the best they can be ‘mentally’ should be making a natural transition towards being the best they can be ‘physically’. It’s a natural thing! Therefore, if someone smokes Newports like a chimney yet says their really about positive growth and development, they will eventually put the fags down; it’s common sense and the natural progression of growth and development. The same thing applies with any substance that takes away more than it gives us. Keep in Mind that for all of us who claim to be striving for perfection, we’re all striving to arrive at the point of optimum health. In this striving, we must also respect that we -and everyone else- are doing it in their “own good time” (39/1-40)! That’s why I said I’m not a visible advocate of having a certain dietary lifestyle. I only speak on the subject of dietary habits when I can clearly cee that a person isn’t honestly using their “own good time” in seeking optimum health. As a matter of fact, I treat knowledge of self the same way. It’s not my job to micro-manage a person’s physical or mental growth and development, especially when they’re a grown as adult!

So to conclude Today’s Article I just wanna emphasize the importance of simply being conscious of your physical health; without the Body there is no conduit for the Mind. For those pre-excrementalists who have taken up the mantle of providing dietary information for us who may not be into the shit that deep, keep doing what you do! I speak for all of us when I say your job has not been in vain! You are all doing a tremendous job with helping us strike a mental/physical balance when in comes to living out the best of what this culture has to offer.


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